Dear Christian Woman, I want you to know that God’s heart bleeds for you as a husband and we are His bride.
This morning, I woke up with a burning heart. I couldn’t get over this feeling I had, and asked God why. As I began praying, I read this verse in my quiet time:
I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him (1 Corinthians 11:2).
Wow, just wow! I know I’ve read through 1 & 2 Corinthians before, but I have never seen this verse. Or maybe the Holy Spirit saved it for me for such a time as this.
Dear Christian Woman, I know your heart is breaking, and I am praying for you!
I know you see no other way out–but there is a way, and His name is Jesus.
I know your resources are limited.
I know you feel lonely now, but this I promise you: you are not alone.
Dear Christian Woman, There is a difference between conviction and condemnation.
The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so. Those who are in the realm of the flesh cannot please God (Romans 8:6-8).
Godly sorrow is needed now to bring you into repentance. Once you confess your sins, He is faithful and just to forgive you and cleanse you from all unrighteousness.
Learn to say, “I believe help me in my unbelief!”
Learn to stop playing the Christian.
Learn to be transparent with others so they can help you.
Later, I received an email from a dear Christian woman in South Africa. She said that she picked up a copy of Not Another Dating Book, and wanted to thank me for writing, and let me know she was encouraged to keep waiting for a godly mate. (She is 40). Wow!
Dear Christian Woman, If you think being single and lonely is bad–wait until you get married!
I used to believe that if I waited to have sex until I was married that I would have the perfect marriage. Okay maybe not perfect, but you know what I mean. I also thought that we be worth more to the church.
This is incorrect thinking!
Dear Christian Woman, You are God’s bride no matter if you are single or married.
The past three years as a married Christian woman have been hard–if not harder–than some of my single years.
Yes it is hard to wait for marriage for sex.
Yes it sucks to literally feel like the only one waiting.
Yes it is depressing to think that marriage may not be in the cards.
But what happens when you are married and happy with almost no one else to hang with? When your close friends are miles or states away? When you have tried 20 churches in 3 years and made a total of 3 friends?
Maybe it’s because all Christians go through waiting periods.
Maybe it’s because God has better on the other side.
Dear Christian Woman, Chastity is for lovers.
Chastity is not some ancient term or a term to make you anxious.
Chastity simply means the state of being chaste.
And what does being chaste mean?
According to to the Miriam Webster dictionary it has three meanings:
1. Not having sex
2. Morally decent or pure: not sinful
3. Simple or plain
According to Arleen Spenceley, “Chastity doesn’t separate sexuality from the rest of the stuff that makes us human, but helps us to arrange our lives in such a way that sexuality isn’t misused (See CCC 2337)…We live, however, in a culture that isn’t conducive to chastity, a culture for which restraint is incomprehensible—a culture that creates conditions in which we believe we can and should get what we want when we want it, without consequence. In other words, we live in a culture that teaches us to subordinate reason to desire—to act on all the urges ever.”
Dear Christian Woman, I urge you to give all your desires to God.
Let Him fill you.
Let Him help you to live a sinless life.
Let Him give you the courage to keep waiting whether you’re single, married, or divorced.
For your Maker is your husband—the Lord Almighty is his name—the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth (Isaiah 54:5).